A couple weeks ago, the theme ingredient for Thursday Drink Night was Kahlúa, and I'll be frank: I was not excited about this. I am not a Kahlúa fan. The cloying sweetness conjures images of sticky frat bathrooms and sexual regret. However, knowing that even the lowly Jägermeister has its occasional uses, I was resolved to come up with something that wouldn't end in tearful toilet hugging.

Well... lets say there is something worthwhile about working within constraints. The result was one of the best drinks I've concocted in some time. But before we get to the recipe, I'll share the nugget of cocktailing wisdom that made this endeavor successful. Pay attention.

If you read Rick's blog with any frequency, you know how he is always like ZOMG FeRnEt BrAnCa iS TeH BeSt ThInG EvAr It GoEs In EvErYtHiNg!!! HaHa LMAO WTF!!! Right? You know this. Well, I don't quite share his school girl enthusiasm. I love the bitterness, but quickly tire of the menthol as it has a way of dominating everything it touches. However, and this is the important part, there is a way to cheat with Fernet. Remember how you put a little cinnamon and grapefruit in that train-wreck SeanMike suggested and it was suddenly delicious? Well, Fernet Branca has the same sort of symbiotic relationship with pomaceous distillates. They're the Kurt and Courtney of the cocktail set. That criminally over-priced pear eau-de-vie you've been afraid to open, let alone risk on experimental mixing? Its time has come. Take an ounce of that and half as much Fernet and you're halfway to delicious nirvana. (You see what I did there?) Now, here is the recipe you've been waiting for:

Four Stars

Drop a healthy swath of lemon zest into your shaker glass and muddle the fuck out of it. You want lots of lemon oil. Add ice and the rest of your ingredients, shake ferociously, and double strain. Yes, I know you've been told all-spirit drinks should be stirred, but in this case you want the softer texture and dilution of a shaken drink. Now hand it to the nearest cocktail snob and gloat when they have to admit loving a Kahlúa drink.